I was sitting a bar when I got the call. Kept my composure, finished my drink, hopped in my truck and wept as I drove back to the house. I honestly cannot recall my final Father’s Day with my dad. Maybe because it is 12:08am and the insomnia that has plagued me for the past week has been relentless, or just that blur of a year which was 2020…
By the grace of God I had 40 Father’s days with him. Every year I would find some lunatic card in the Shoebox section, bring some booze, food, my charming self, and share a meal with my entire family. I suppose some might be understanding if I was bitter right now that the last Father’s day I would celebrate with him escapes me… But what is one day in a lifetime?
Every day was Father’s day.
It has been what, 7 months now? I miss him every day – but on the same note, I know he has never left me. It is the physical presence I miss, the voice, the conversations, the hugs. There I go now, tears. It is funny how it hits randomly like that. I touch upon the simplest memory, a brief moment over a 41 year life, and boom… I’m in that truck again.
Now I am not trying to drag anyone down here, as (looks up at topic) – the point of this post is me, telling you, to pick up a phone, or if you are so blessed – go hug your dad. One day you will miss it terribly. I understand completely that our existence on this planet when measured against the eternity that my father has returned to is horribly brief… so embrace it completely.
I will keep this brief. I am not bitter whatsoever, I am hopeful. I am joyful. I am blessed beyond words because of who he was and how he raised me. My family was blessed beyond words because of my father. I know that I will see him again, illuminated in the glory of God when we are reunited in eternity. Today I will think of him, talk to him, even share a drink.
But I cannot hug him right now. So please, go hug yours until the stuffing comes out… or he farts. Whichever comes first. I love you, Dad. I miss you. Happy Father’s Day.
Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.
Proverbs 22:6